come out of hiding, i'm right here beside you

[barehands]

[A while after the execution has ended, everyone will find a simple note slipped under their door.]

If you don't want to be alone after everything that's happening, some of us will be in the dining room. Even if you decide not to come, please remember that you aren't alone here.

[The note isn't signed, but the handwriting is feminine and neat.

For anyone who decides to come, there's a good array of food laid out on the table. There are some small and simple cakes, cookies, and pastries, a healthy amount of okonomiyaki, okayu, and other Japanese dishes (with a focus on rice and eggs), along with curry. In addition, there are pancakes, and a large pot of soup. It looks like a few people collaborated to make enough food for everyone here.

Just like the meal they shared together earlier in the week, the candles from the storage room lend a more peaceful light than the fluorescent lights above.]

Comments

[imaginex]

Well... I think so long as you two have an understanding, that's the most important part. What everyone else things shouldn't matter as much. She must trust you to come back.

[So there's someone for Kogami to return to, though she has no thoughts on the nature of their relationship. She just finds it nice hearing that there are people waiting for the Patients to come home.

Good relationships. Good people (she hopes). People who don't hurt them.

(Everything Arietta lost).

With an oddly tilted smile, glances at the window right behind her]

What's your city like?

[carnivorously]

She's a little too understanding, I think.

[He lets out a breathy laugh. His city, though...? Hmmm. He takes a puff of his cigarette as he thinks about this.]

It's bright and vibrant. People everywhere, content as they go on with their lives peacefully and ignorant of anything that may be foul in the world. But that's the purpose. Those people just need to live their orderly lives... and be happy.

[There's no resentment in his voice. No jealousy, nothing. Just a simple explanation of where he's from.]

You seem to not talk about yourself much, Matou. [He gives her a once over.] Is there a reason for that? Usually girls your age have a lot of things to talk about.

[He's not prodding and there's a sense of 'knowing' in his voice.]

[imaginex]

[Kogami's voice lulls on, and Sakura's head gently presses against the window glass as she listens, as if being soothed by a light rain. It's not true peace - those moments have always been so few and far between in her life - but it's what she wanted.

Someone talking, distracting her, allowing her to sink into the quiet of her mind.

... A shame it's shattered a moment later, because if Kogami has a fault in her eyes, it's that he's too observant. She doesn't stiffen or tighten her shoulders, doesn't even move.

That's probably more suspicious.]

Do they? [A light question. She doesn't look at him] ... I admit, I don't get out much at home. Just school, and then Senpai's house. Sometimes the supermarket.

[No mention of friends, or significant others, or trips to the mall. If he's watching, he'll notice her hands fidget]

[carnivorously]

[Being observant is his job. He's supposed to be able to look into the crowd go "hey there's our perpetrator" and then arrest them without making a scene a lot of the times. It's a natural thing he does and he can't turn it off.

Because in a way, it's a penance for him.]

I see.

[He watches her. Watches her fidget. If she were a criminal, he'd be interrogating her further. Almost out of habit, he wants to, but he needs to know that he has to switch off right now.

Instead, he finally chooses to sit next to her. There's a heavy scent of smoke on him, though that's obvious given he's smoking right now.

He opens his mouth a bit as if he was going to say something, and instead chooses to place his cigarette between his lips. A habit he sort of has to try to hide that maybe he wanted to speak.]

[imaginex]

[Kogami watching her is what she expects. She can handle it. Eleven years of ill-fated luck with make her handle it. There's not a sound from her, save the forced evenness of her breathing, and while she turns briefly at Kogami's sudden change in position, she's quick to keep her eyes down.

The framing of her hair helps. Still no ribbon. The effect is that her face looks that much more closed off from the rest of the world.]

... Shinya-san.

It's alright if you want to ask me something.

[Doesn't mean he'll get the truth.

But she won't keep him from talking]

[carnivorously]

No, it's fine. I'm not even sure what I want to ask.

[She's on edge and he knows he's the one that caused it. Part of him wants to calm her, yet part of him wants to destroy that friendliness between them. He had enjoyed Arietta's company when he spoke with her only for her to go back to her animalistic instincts and kill. Someone who appeared to be rather docile.

Who's to say that Sakura is no different?

He wants to protect-- but he also doesn't want to die.]

You just remind me a lot of my supervisor in some ways.

[And for some reason she gives off the same 'smell' as Kogami. It's... weird.]

[imaginex]

She does?

[The caution is automatic, based on how she continues to face the window rather than him, but... but also automatic is the hope of a compliment, enough to soften the lines of her edginess. Kogami finished praising his supervisor in his own way, after all. Her tone is curious.]

What is she like?

[Hopefully not the selfish and petty coward Sakura feels most days.]

[carnivorously]

[Selfish and cowardly is what Kogami is too. Just perhaps not in the same way.]

Tsunemori is kind and accepting. She was told to not trust me by another supervisor and instead she chose to try to see eye to eye with me. Her sense of justice is pure and I feel human around her. There are many times she could have lost faith in me, but instead she chose to continue to be my partner and trust me.

[There's that gentle smile again.]

Though I'm afraid one day I'll break that trust.

[imaginex]

Aa... she sounds like a wonderful person.

["Kind and accepting", he says. Which means his supervisor is nothing at all like herself (she knew it). Still, Sakura tries her hardest to sound pleasant for Kogami's sake. There's no need to turn this into a big deal.

Arietta's death is making her tired. Yes. She'll cling to that excuse with every breath.]

But if you're already afraid of it happening, then I think you'll be okay.

Fear means you'll be watching yourself, right? To make sure it doesn't happen. [She assumes because, well... that's been her life's work. Though her crest is still absent, Sakura turns her gaze inward, feeling every twitch of muscle]

[carnivorously]

I can't guarantee it won't happen.

[He looks up to the ceiling and gives a bit of a self-depreciating laugh.]

I have one goal... and I'll probably do anything to achieve it.

[He knows that much about himself. He's kept himself alive for that very reason. And it's that belief that makes him know he'll probably be hurting a lot of feelings. He already hurt Gino's feelings. A man that... a man that no longer has faith in him.]

She gives me hope that maybe I can be a detective. I'm not entirely sure if I cling on to it, though.

[imaginex]

Is being a detective the one thing you want most?

[No matter the answer he gives her, she doesn't pause or hover over her words. Her voice goes on, low and steady, watching the fog cling to the window]

Everyone has a goal they'd do almost anything for, I think. [A slight shift] It's a matter of patience, seeing if you can reach it without sacrificing someone else for it.

[Some do, and they're upstanding citizens.

Some don't, and they're the criminals.

And some? Some are just unlucky regardless]

Your supervisor sounds like someone who can help you wait, to maybe do things the right way.

[carnivorously]

Maybe she can. Maybe there's hope despite our flawed system.

[That's right, he just said something about his system being flawed. He catches that he says that, but it's not like he's really hiding anything from himself. He's like the Transmitter. Unless asked, he's not going to answer.]

I want to hope we can do this right.

[He inhales... then exhales as he looks out the window himself.]

Then maybe I can finally rest.

[imaginex]

[Sakura's not really a girl who asks the big questions out loud. She isn't relentlessly inquisitive, like Rin, and definitely isn't half as smart. The Tohsaka heir exists on the opposite end of the spectrum, so much that sometimes Sakura wonders if...

Well. That doesn't matter. A thought best discarded.]

Mm... but you have to survive this before you can rest. [It's just the truth. She seems to dip into bluntness more often when she's around Kogami. That almost scares her]

You'll be careful, won't you?

[carnivorously]

That's true. I can't die here. I have something I absolutely must do.

[There's emotion on Kogami's face. Sadness. Anger. His voice is a low growl exhibiting those same emotions as well. The guarded man that usually hides behind a smirk and rude words and behavior is almost unguarded around a high school girl.

What is it with young women and their tendency to do this to him? Maybe he's soft.]

[imaginex]

[She's never gotten a chance to see Kogami at his rudest, but that doesn't mean she can't sense the fragility underneath that resolve. Something he must absolutely do.

That's the kind of dedication that turned Arietta into a murderer.


In the corner of her mind, Rin's disapproval blares like a siren at full volume.]

Right... We'll both get home...

[Spoken mostly to herself, it sounds less a promise and more a prayer.]

[carnivorously]

[He was sympathetic to Arietta's reasons. He really was, more than he thought he would. Honestly, he should be mad, but he's not. At the moment, he's calm like nothing really happened. Then again, aside from the trial, murders are just an everyday part of his life.

People who's lives he investigates without ever getting to know them. Solving crimes, not really getting attached to anything or anyone.]

Somehow, some way, we'll get home.

[His voice is soft, but there's still that subtle low growl. Like he might be determined now.]

I can't die here.

[For someone so affixed with crime and murder-- he has the same obsession with not dying while thrusting himself into danger.]

[imaginex]

[Eventually, Sakura folds up her legs, perched on the window ledge with her arms rested on top of her knees. It's not a position she usually takes, and the girl looks even smaller for it.

Stranger still is that she's smiling suddenly, glancing at Kogami]

You really would be good at therapy, Shinya-san. I'm glad I talked to you.

[carnivorously]

Would I? I think I'd be terrible at it.

[Especially since sometimes he puts other people in psychological danger thinking the risk will pay off.

Sometimes.]

[imaginex]

[Hey, can't make an omelette without breaking a few... okay that's a terrible metaphor and says too much about Sakura.]

Oh? Well... I guess it only counts if it's me, then. [She doesn't seem to mind that, either]

[carnivorously]

What makes you say that?

[He's a little concerned he can help her. Then again, he did lend Tsunemori an ear when she needed it as well.]

[imaginex]

It's because I feel a little better.

[Maybe she feels understood. Maybe it helped he'd prodded her into giving answers. Sakura doubts it matters. Even a slight turn in the tide is significant for her, and the burn in her chest has lessened to a simmer]

[carnivorously]

I guess that's a good thing I could help then.

[Especially since his opinion is usually discarded. He's used to it, though, and that's okay. It's weird that people respect his opinion here, the more he thinks on it. It makes him feel... human again.]

[imaginex]

Mm.

Though I... I don't understand why you try.

[If he wants to be nice to someone, he should at least find someone more worthy of his time, frankly.

Perhaps its pity? Sakura turns the thought in her head, examining it for imperfections, but ultimately discards it in the trash. She doesn't think Kogami prefers that pitying approach.]

[carnivorously]

I guess I tried because it seemed like you needed someone to talk to.

[That perhaps despite all of Kogami's flaws, he still has a big heart that's able to help. It helps in his own way, but that doesn't mean that often times his intentions are good.]

[imaginex]

[he really is too sweet to her, she thinks in the quiet]

Did I?

[...]

I guess it doesn't occur to me to try.